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Golden Nuggets from me to you

How to have more victories more often…

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Congratulations are due…
 
…for all of your awesome VICTORIES last week!!!
 
Did you just say: “Huh?”
 
As in: “Who, me?”
 
As in: “But nothing special happened last week.”
 
As in: “Honestly, I don’t think I deserve these balloons…”
 
Well then, you and I definitely need to have a little talk about how you are defining the term “victory”.
 
 
My guess is you (like so many people) are defining a victory as:

“a BIG achievement that, when shared, would be recognized by society as undeniably and inarguably worth congratulating you for.”

Like getting a job or a promotion, or getting published, or getting nominated for an award, or wining a race.
 
 
These big victories feel safe to share.
 
Know why?
 
Because “big” victories are usually when someone else or a fact (like your winning race time) confirms your greatness. So it feels safe (and not arrogant) to say, “Hey look, this organization thinks I’m awesome!”
 
Don’t get me wrong, those are totally cool victories.
 
Unfortunately, they don’t happen that often. And what sustains you in the time between those big victories, is you expanding your definition of what a victory is to include all of the important, little victories that happen in between – like:
 
:: You shifting your mindset from one of fearful scarcity to one of courageous abundance before you go in for that audition.
 
:: You pressing the Send key to submit a grant application.
 
:: You investing in your career by buying that course.
 
:: You choosing to take a personal day to let yourself breathe.
 
:: You deciding to conserve your energy by not engaging with your brother when he leaves that provoking voicemail message.
 
 
A victory is a victory because YOU decide it is – that’s all the validity required.
 
A victory that falls into your lap is just as valid as one you put a lot of effort into.
 
Shifting to your next level of success requires sustaining a feeling of momentum. Owning all of your victories, celebrating them, and sharing them with a person or group of people who will feel genuinely and unabashedly happy for you, is how you nurture both your progress and your positivity.
 
 
Keep betting on yourself – I believe in you,

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Significant shifts require some bold moves…

Categories: coaching, golden nuggetsAuthor:


 
The crazy thing is…
 
…your comfort zone has an elastic waistband!
 
And each Bold Move you make stretches it wider and wider – increasing your capacity for success.
 
(Or for pie.)
 
What qualifies as a Bold Move?
 
That’s for you to define for yourself.
 
:: It’s that idea you kinda wish you hadn’t had…

:: The plan which makes you nervous yet excited…

:: Or very likely that thing you’re putting off (and putting off…)
 
 
Once upon a time for me it was dropping off my head shots to casting directors. Once upon a time for someone else it was carving Mt. Rushmore.
 
It’s not the size of a Bold Move that matters but the fact that the doing of it takes you into uncharted territory and challenges you – even just a wee bit – to risk and grow and trust and s-t-r-e-t-c-h.
 
It requires you to step into the shoes of the person you want to be.
 
And eventually (amazingly) those moves become “no big deal, been there, done that” sorts of things.
 
And please take a moment to celebrate every Bold Move you make!
 
(That’s where the pie comes in.)
 
 
Keep betting on yourself – I believe in you,

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An insight that can make you feel better…

Categories: coaching, golden nuggetsAuthor:


 
This was by far…
 
…one of the most stress-relieving realizations I ever had:
 
Being good at something does not necessarily equate with feeling good at it (a.k.a feeling good while doing it).
 
For example:
 
I had become effective at networking – but didn’t realize it because I still never felt comfortable while doing it.
 
I had assumed that developing my networking skills would also mean that I would eventually feel more and more at ease while connecting with people.
 
That last part hasn’t happened yet (and quite possibly never will), BUT, fortunately, I now realize that my feelings are quite separate from my abilities.
 
To which area of your life might this same little insight apply?
 
And why is that worth asking yourself?

:: So you can fully own the level of skill you have cultivated (and celebrate it!)

:: So you can eliminate stress in certain areas that you are actually quite solid in.

:: So you can relax into (rather than resist) the feelings of weirdness and discomfort that may always linger around certain areas of your life.
 
Shifts which result in plugging holes where your energy was unnecessarily leaking away.
 
As the sage Christopher Robin once told the mighty Pooh:
 
Promise me you’ll always remember that you’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
 
 
Keep betting on yourself – I believe in you,

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